Texted Aurelia to see if she was still up for a drink and a film. She didn’t even bother texting back for 2 and a half hours and by that time the bloody film was long gone. In fact it wasn't long gone at all. It had been cancelled. But I didn’t mention that to her. She made some excuse about having a cold. I didn’t believe it for a minute. She then sent me a series of bizarre texts that finally convinced me she is an absolute, as MDM would say, ‘nutter’.